exam starts today!

Oh Allah, open our minds, strengthen our confidence and bestow upon us your mercy. We've done all that we can oh God, and we know the rest is ordained by You. Oh Allah, accept our prayers for you are the Almighty, Most Merciful.

Amin.

:) All the best people!

do you see what i see?

my first paper is this tuesday. My head feels really heavy and i am tired all the time. this is the hard times, folks.

but its at times like this that the littlest thing you find when you least expected it, those little things really lift up you spirit.

do you see what im talking about?

i was about to go to class when i noticed it. it just makes my day :)

its all in the mirror and i think its been there for months now :)

sisters!

maybe its the exam madness but im missing malysia so much right now. i miss malaysian food, home and loved ones.

nurul dah form 3 and has started writing those kinda essays for PMR (click to enlarge picture) and iqa dah tinggggiiiiii. even taller than i am maybe! hahahah.

cepat3 habis exam!!!

berusaha ppllll!!

hiyahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

Holding it all together as best as i could

i havent call home for two days so i I called this morning. Nurul answered it and i asked her to pass me to Mama. Theres something different in her voice, trembling, almost inaudible. Maybe poor connection, i thought.
i jokingly asked her

"knapa mama sounds so sad ni, tak mau ckp ngn angah ke? :( "
"bukan lah angah, sbb mama mmg tgh sad'
"oh, why why why, crite la"

and thats when mama asked me wther ive read yesterdays newspaper. i Knew then something just isnt right.

"Abg Alim dah xde ngah"
"oh, kenapa kenapa? die pegi mana?"
"die dah xde ngah, die accident smlm, it was in the newspaper."
"...... bila ma? kenapa? apa jadi?"
"smlm, malam pukul 10, die accident just 5 mins away from his home. baru je mama jumpe die 2 days ago."
"innalillah" and i cried my heart out...

****
abg alim is my cousin sebelah Melaka. if im not mistaken, he is 25/26 this year. His real name is Faizal and i have no idea where we get the Alim nickname from.

i have always adored Abg Alim for his endearing personality. not to mention, he is quite a heart throb. :) I used to jokingly call him Yusry KRU, because, he exatly look like him when he dress up smartly. During family gath, Abg Alim yang paling rajin melayan all the sepupu2. He would do a few trips and take us all to the mall for a movie or just for ais kacang together.

Now, at 26, Abg Alim was a budding bussiness man. He owned a grocery store in Melaka which is rapidly growing under his management. Abg alim had a beautiful girlfriend and was soon to get engaged to her if everythng went well. I remember chatting to him bout the store and see how ambitious he is about the whole bussiness plan for his future plans. I adore him for that too.

but i guess, God has better plans for him.

Selasa malam, Abg Alim was helping Pak Seman, his dad (my uncle) to tidy up the house. from the stories i heard, Abg Alim suddenly said to Pak Seman

"Ayah, kalau Alim mati, ayah tanam alim dekat2 dengan kubur ayah nanti tau"
Pak Seman was caught off guard and Adik Anne, (Alim's lil sis) menyampuk
"Oh kalau cmtu Anne takmau kubur sbelah Alim la.. Alim bising! tak aman nnt! heheheh"
Alim smiled and said jokingly "Tapi Alim nak kubur sbelah ayah, ayah kan org Masjid boleh Alim tumpang terang kubur nnt :)"

They all laughed and then have dinner and perform Isyak prayer together. After prayer, Abg Alim told Mak Lin (my aunt) hes off to the store to see how things are. He salam Mak Lin before keluar rumah and Mak lin asked "Ibu tngok Alim berseri-seri malam ni, nak jumpe sesiape ke?"
Abg Alim just smiled and take his motorbike and off he went.

And that was it. En route to his store, Abg Alim had an accident. He ran into a car straight ahead of him and was flung far away from his bike. He died on the spot. The body was retained from the hospital in perfect condition. mama said, its hard to believe he was in a road accident because there were no cuts or bruise anywhere. The doctors said the cause of death was severe internal heammorhage.
this is the best picture i could find of Abg Alim. It was my first raya away and nurul kirim this picture. This is not even half of nenek's cucu. But nenek has one less grand child now. And he, was standing 2nd from left.

Abg Alim selamat dikebumikan at the tanah perkuburan depan rumah nenek. Semoga ditempatkan bersama org2 beriman. Al-Fatihah.

Note to Self :gotta take it like a man

or woman. for that matter.

The dreaded finals is coming. now stop mopping around pretending like youve got a whole lot of time in the world before it starts. time is gold. use it or lose it, its your call.gonna stop whining insyaallah and just try my best. wish me luck you guys.

p/s: to The Other Half, keep your head in the game. Everything else could wait :) All the best. love always.